Tuesday, May 17, 2011


As promised here is My ttc #3 plan. I say MY plan because apparently I am the only person that is ttc #3 in my house.

Last night after we cut off the lights and tv, Bobby said "Do you really want another baby? Cause I am really happy with the 2 we do have. If we are then we need to get going, I guess."

I said "Yes of course I do. I always wanted 3 kids", he said "I will do whatever you want, but I think 2 is plenty. We will never have anything if we have another. I am content. It is all I can do to make it work with the 2 we have."

My solution: "I will give up something" Bobby asked me what can I give up? I don't know, I already am the ONLY main person to sacrifice so I don't know. The only thing I do know is that IF we don't TTC #3, I am afraid in a few years I will regret it and be disappointed that we didn't even try.

I sent Bobby a text message today about and the response was "This is not a texting conversation. I will go out to dinner with you and discuss it because I want to concentrate on you, the discussion, and what is said." So I guess case closed until we get to go out to eat... which we haven't done by OURSELVES since October, so I wonder when we will go...

So the plan was:

1. Go off BC next month (June)
2. Have Dr up my Metformin to 1000 mg (what I was taking at Jones, currently I am on 500 mg)
3. Do progesterone suppositories (I think I took 2 a day at the Jones)
4. Try for 6 months at the most and if no BFP wrap it up and call it done and It is the way it is meant to be AND sell ALL the baby stuff overtaking my attic

That's it. Nothing more than that. NO stimming ovaries, NO Clomid, NO Follistim, NOTHING!

Bobby has stressed on numerous occasions that he is scared that we will miscarry again. He can't take losing another baby or watch me go through that pain again. I understand that, I do. I don't know how I would feel if we lost another baby, but I survived it 2 times, so I could survive again. It would suck though for sure.

Also, not having a sibling for the girls is NOT as devastating as the thought of never having a child of our own ever. They have each other. I thought when I found out it was twins, YES, we will never have to go through treatments again. I can promise I won't go through treatments again. I can't do it... the hot flashes, the time, the hormones, the sticks, the blood draws, the u/s... I can't. I don't have time now and like I said, not having a sibling for them is different for me.

I want a 3rd baby, but I will be ok if we don't have one. But I think if we don't even try I will always wonder. Does that make sense?

PS- At work so no new pics of girls on this computer, sorry.

Monday, May 9, 2011

A day late and a dollar short...

That's the story of my life, but Hey I have twins and that's my excuse (and demise financially) and I am sticking to it! But....


I enjoyed my day and gave myself a treat... pictures of my 21 month old bay-bies! Time slow down...wait let me catch up! Geesh! Go a little slower!

Getting good pictures are hard of one kid, let alone two kiddos who want to move. But I am pleased with what we got. Kristin was a HAM! Let me tell you. She was all, Hey take my picture cause I am cute, smiling and all. Lara was ON THE GO! I mean I couldn't get her to be still. The picture of them together was the very first picture and then the rest she was a blur in the pictures. Even her dress is blurry in the one of her as she was running! But I am still happy with what we got, cause it is a true reflection of my life!

Oh and just in case you didn't notice, totally trying to make up for my 3 month pause as I scraped by while doing that stupid class! Plus I figure everyone wants to see how precious the bay-bays are... cause I think they are!

Hope you all enjoyed your mother's day!

Friday, May 6, 2011

Call me a "nerd"

My final grade was posted yesterday... "A"! YAY! 4.0 maintained! I wasn't sure, this class was HARD and very intense! So I am proud of myself!

The girls are just so amazing. They do something new and say something everyday. They mimic and repeat us...so cool! We try to play with them outside everyday, weather permitting. The biggest hits are the sandbox and the tricycles. We take them for walks with their tricycles. Cracks us up as the stare at something and the tricycle starts veering off the opposite way! They LOVE dogs and get so excited when they see one. "Dog, Dog, Dog" between squeals of delight. Someday, we will have another, but I still miss Reese. I still cry for him so I can't imagine getting another dog anytime soon. Anyways, here's the girls and some of their adventures:

Lara loves to take care of her sister...

Kristin pushing Lara on the tricycle

Lara pushing Kristin.

At least they take turns (we did buy 2 tricycles though) pushing each other, Mommy gets tired sometimes.

Oh and while taking this class, the stress of hating my job still, life in general and to make myself feel better... I went back on South Beach. I have lost 15 lbs in a little over 2 months. I am exercising and I just plain feel better. Also a little prep for the possible trial for baby #3. Gotta try to get in shape even if I don't get pregnant, I needed to lose this baby weight from the girls, 20 months after them is just plain too long to carry around the extra 30-35lbs from being pregnant with them. So I hope to continue this lifestyle change and good habits and IF I am lucky I will have lost more weight and be closer to the weight I was when I got pregnant with them, just in case I get pregnant this summer. I promise I will do a post about my TTC plan and all soon.....